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To oversimplify what I mean, let’s take coffee for example. Only use current photos in your profile: One of the most common complaints I hear from men is that women frequently misrepresent themselves in their photos by using old photos (sometimes decades old) or by cropping them in too tightly so you don’t realize they are of a certain body type.

Most people can agree they don’t like scalding hot coffee, but it’s tough to get people to agree on how they do like their coffee. Obviously men do this as well; I’ve just heard this complaint more frequently from men than from women.

Enter Siren, which was founded by a woman (a trait none of the other mainstream dating apps share, except for Coffee Meets Bagel) and positions itself as “a dating app that puts women in control of their visibility and encourages women to make the first move.” Think of it as a two-way mirror: a woman can browse men to her heart’s content, but a man can’t see a woman’s photo until she gives him the green light.

I talked to CEO and Founder Susie Lee about how Siren — currently only available in Seattle and on i Phones, with plans for an Android app and expansion to New York, D. and San Francisco — meets the as-yet-unmet needs of many online daters, why she believes women need to be able to dictate the terms of their tech-based romantic interactions, and why a guy would sign up for an app that doesn’t let him automatically see the photos of the women he’s hoping to meet. I’m a visual artist, so I come through the perspective of observation through that lens.

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Throughout it all, what became most apparent during the discussion is that men didn’t want a “don’t” list. What they really want is some advice on what I hesitated to even write this piece because what people like is far more subjective than what people don’t like. To that end, this is my list “to do’s” for people (yes, people, not just men) who are trying to find a long-term partner using an online dating site:1.A Crime Watch Daily undercover investigation has found that many women are playing a dangerous game of "romantic Russian Roulette" on Internet dating sites and apps like Tinder, Grindr, Bumble, Zoosk, OKCupid and POF.Tinder users can swipe their way through more than 1.6 billion profiles every day.Men and women alike share concerns about the amount of data that these third-party apps can access, especially on apps like Tinder and Hinge that pull photos and information from your Facebook profile.There’s a need for balance between revealing enough about yourself so you can find someone who could be a good match for you and having enough privacy so that if, say, a potential employer is also on the app, you don’t have to worry about seeing each other.

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